OMG! How you describe the emotions of grief makes so clear what I felt in the 90’s when the grief I had suppressed from my first 42 years started to explode. I thought I was just broken and bad to feel the way I was feeling. I didn’t realize it was grief because the deaths had been some years before. Even after I recognized it had been grief in 2002 and have been freed from it, this detailed list today is healing me on new levels. At 75 this is a blessing. You do good work 💔❤️🩹❤️
I'm not a guy but I read what you write anyway. You put it all in real guy wrenching language. I remember waking up the morning after my son died. For a split second I was OK, then I remembered and it felt like someone punched me in my solar plexus. I thought I was having a heart attack. As I've gone through 19 months, I've discovered that's where my grief lives. It builds in my chest and has to come out. Thank you for this raw look at grief. And the part about slogging thru mud? Here on the SC coast we have pluff mud. That's what it felt like. Stuck in the pluff, trying to walk out.
I'm so sorry you lost your son. Losing a child is one of the hardest things a human being can face. And I can relate so much to your physical experience of grief.
Even though I am Canadian, I've been to SC many times and absolutely love it ♥️♥️
Jason, I have work friends (remote tech job) from Toronto who have come to meetings in Charleston and stopped by to visit with me and have lunch. If you come this way again, I'm in Georgetown now but I go back to Mt. Pleasant all the time. Please let me know and we can get together for lunch. I find myself starving to talk about Evan and his life. I would love to hear your stories too. The more we talk, the more we heal. But I think some believe they'll hurt my feelings. People don't realize canceling my son's life hurts more than anything. For just a few minutes, our children are alive and with us. That gives me fuel until the next time I can say his name. I enjoy reading what you write. Please keep writing.
This is extraordinary writing, I have felt all these emotions you have described and always deep in my solar plexus. I thank you for writing this as a support for those that are also there and for those who have no idea what this is like, hoping they might understand a little.
I needed to read this, as I wait for my father to pass away and stop suffering from the motor neuron disease that has stuck him in his useless body. It was as if I was reading my own diary.
I just wanted to say you have identified the emotions that I have experienced over the last 25 years. I still feel it to this day. My mother died at 44. I wrote about it here if you would like to read it.
OMG! How you describe the emotions of grief makes so clear what I felt in the 90’s when the grief I had suppressed from my first 42 years started to explode. I thought I was just broken and bad to feel the way I was feeling. I didn’t realize it was grief because the deaths had been some years before. Even after I recognized it had been grief in 2002 and have been freed from it, this detailed list today is healing me on new levels. At 75 this is a blessing. You do good work 💔❤️🩹❤️
I am so grateful that this chapter had such and impact and deeply touched that you chose to share your story with me. Thank you! ♥️
I'm not a guy but I read what you write anyway. You put it all in real guy wrenching language. I remember waking up the morning after my son died. For a split second I was OK, then I remembered and it felt like someone punched me in my solar plexus. I thought I was having a heart attack. As I've gone through 19 months, I've discovered that's where my grief lives. It builds in my chest and has to come out. Thank you for this raw look at grief. And the part about slogging thru mud? Here on the SC coast we have pluff mud. That's what it felt like. Stuck in the pluff, trying to walk out.
I'm so sorry you lost your son. Losing a child is one of the hardest things a human being can face. And I can relate so much to your physical experience of grief.
Even though I am Canadian, I've been to SC many times and absolutely love it ♥️♥️
Jason, I have work friends (remote tech job) from Toronto who have come to meetings in Charleston and stopped by to visit with me and have lunch. If you come this way again, I'm in Georgetown now but I go back to Mt. Pleasant all the time. Please let me know and we can get together for lunch. I find myself starving to talk about Evan and his life. I would love to hear your stories too. The more we talk, the more we heal. But I think some believe they'll hurt my feelings. People don't realize canceling my son's life hurts more than anything. For just a few minutes, our children are alive and with us. That gives me fuel until the next time I can say his name. I enjoy reading what you write. Please keep writing.
This is extraordinary writing, I have felt all these emotions you have described and always deep in my solar plexus. I thank you for writing this as a support for those that are also there and for those who have no idea what this is like, hoping they might understand a little.
I needed to read this, as I wait for my father to pass away and stop suffering from the motor neuron disease that has stuck him in his useless body. It was as if I was reading my own diary.
I just wanted to say you have identified the emotions that I have experienced over the last 25 years. I still feel it to this day. My mother died at 44. I wrote about it here if you would like to read it.
https://open.substack.com/pub/eriksvensson/p/my-mothers-life-was-way-too-short?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=j07re
I read it brother and I thought it was a beautifully written piece and a lovely testament to your mom. I’ve restacked it and subscribed.
I’m glad it landed with you my friend.